Monday, November 12, 2012

Hard to say


Just a note to my friends;
I do not have the "Science" channel.
I have not seen the Firefly/Browncoat reunion.

I have no plans TO see the reunion special.

I am trying so hard to not keep that in the front of my mind; that Wash (my Wash) missed seeing this by 2 months.
So far, I am failing at that.
It is like trying to run away from the sky... cannot be done. Even if one hides, the sky is still there.

I am aware the special is out there.
It hurts in ways I cannot even begin to describe that Wash was not alive to see this.
It does not feel right, or good, or happy to even try to watch it without him.


I will probably be minimally online until I feel emotionally stronger.

Until I know I can pull up a page without seeing the Cast, without being confronted in my face with another memory I could not have with my Wash.

2 months.
2 months.

Haunting.

2 comments:

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